Therapy for Those Who Do Too Much and Struggle to Say No
For women in Bainbridge Island and across Washington state who overfunction and burn out
You’re the one people count on
You are capable. Everyone knows it. You manage the schedules, the work, the people, and the emotions. You get things done even when you are running on fumes. But the truth is, you are exhausted.
You tell yourself it’s just a busy season, but it’s been a long one. You used to thrive under pressure, but now the smallest things feel heavy. Sleep doesn’t help. Vacations don’t fix it. Somewhere along the way, your strength became your trap.
Burnout is not a sign that you’re weak or lazy. It’s a sign that you’ve been carrying too much for too long, often without enough care or help in return.
When overdoing becomes a way of life
Many of the women I work with struggle to slow down, even when they want to. They feel guilty saying no, asking for help, or setting limits. They worry that if they stop moving, everything will fall apart.
Sometimes this pattern comes from people-pleasing or perfectionism. Other times it’s rooted in old beliefs that being good means being useful, or that your worth is measured by what you produce. Either way, it’s hard to rest when your nervous system is wired to keep going.
Therapy helps you untangle these patterns and build a new way of living — one that allows rest, pleasure, and presence without guilt.
You Don’t Have to Identify as an ‘Overdoer’ to Feel the Strain
You may not relate to the word yet…but the signs are still there
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A sense of resentment that doesn’t match the situation (“Why am I the only one who notices this?”)
Feeling irritated by small requests or interruptions
Feeling responsible for other people’s moods, reactions, or comfort
A growing sense of invisibility, like everyone else’s needs come first
Chronic guilt when saying “no” or even considering it
Noticing that internal self-talk is harsh, pressured, or perfectionistic
Feeling anxious when things are unfinished or imperfect
A sense of being “on edge,” but not knowing why
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Constant mental load: remembering everything, tracking everything, preparing for everything, worry about forgetting things
Difficulty relaxing because the brain is always scanning for what needs attention next
Trouble making simple decisions because every option feels like it impacts someone else
Feeling responsible for preventing conflict or disappointment
Believing “it’s just easier if I do it myself”
Thinking, “Everyone else seems to need more from me than I can give”
Believing rest must be “earned”
Struggling to identify what you want without referencing others
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Being the go-to person for help, support, reminders, emotional labor
Feeling irritated that no one checks in on you the way you check in on them
Noticing friendships or relationships feel imbalanced, and maybe blaming yourself
Taking on other people’s chaos or crises as if they’re your responsibility
Being overly attuned to others’ subtle cues or discomfort
Apologizing frequently and often without realizing it
Feeling like people take advantage of your generosity or competence
Difficulty trusting others to follow through or handle things
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Exhaustion that sleep doesn’t fix
Stress showing up as headaches, tension, stomach symptoms
Using productivity to cope with anxiety
Feeling depleted after social interactions, even with people you enoy
Overcommitting, then feeling overwhelmed
Restlessness during downtime because it feels unfamiliar or “unproductive”
Difficulty asking for help, even small things
Constant multitasking, even during moments meant to be restful
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A life that looks “successful” externally but feels heavy internally
Long stretches of just “pushing through” without checking in with yourself
Feeling like you have to justify rest
Realizing you’ve built systems that depend entirely on you
Carrying too many roles: helper, organizer, fixer, emotional anchor
Feeling like your value comes from being useful
A sense that life runs smoothly, but only because you’re the one holding all the pieces
What we’ll focus on
Identifying what keeps you overextended and what you actually want to say yes to
Relearning how to rest and still feel like yourself
Setting limits that protect your time and energy
Managing anxiety, self-criticism, and guilt that appear when you slow down
Reconnecting with your body’s natural cues for rest and balance
Understanding what drives the pressure to overperform and letting it soften
This work is not about doing less to accomplish more. It’s about living in a way that feels sustainable, honest, and aligned with who you are.
Therapy Can Help You Break Free From These Patterns
You don’t need another productivity hack or self-care tip. You need a different way of relating to yourself. Therapy can help you:
Recognize the unworkable patterns that keep you stuck.
Set boundaries that feel solid, not guilt-ridden.
Stop treating your worth as something you have to prove.
Shift from external validation to internal clarity.
Stop treating rest as something to earn.
Breathe easily, sleep better, be more present.
This isn’t about becoming a different person. You can still care deeply and achieve plenty, but it comes from choice rather than obligation. It’s about loosening the grip of expectations that were never yours to begin with. Life starts to feel like something they’re living, not something they’re surviving.
Let’s Work Together
Therapy is a place where you can step back from the expectations, pressure, and exhaustion and figure out what you actually want.
If you’re ready to break free from burnout and stop overgiving in relationships, I’d love to help. Click below to schedule a free consultation, and let’s talk about what working together could look like.
Want to dive in deeper? The From Doing It All to Living Well Intensive was created for women like you: high-capacity, overextended, and ready for real change.
Your Therapy Options
Flexible therapy designed for real life
Telehealth
I currently offer secure online therapy for women across Washington State. Telehealth makes it easy to fit sessions into your life, whether you’re at home, at work, or anywhere you have privacy. Many clients appreciate the flexibility, comfort, and consistency that virtual sessions provide.
In-Person on Bainbridge Island
I offer a limited number of morning appointments for clients who prefer to meet in person.
345 Knechtel Way NE Suite 111
Bainbridge Island, WA 98110-1272
